June 5, 2017

Any sane traveller knows that eating should the priority of a New York itinerary. That much is obvious.

What’s slightly less obvious is what to eat. There are over 26,410 restaurants in New York city, so even if you committed to a new restaurant for three meals each day, it would take you over 24 years to get through them all (and that doesn’t even account for new venues, pop-ups and so on).

Clearly a sophisticated curation process is required, so we’ve gone for what may be called the “smug Instagrammer approach”: tasting that which is weird, wonderful and unique to NYC.

Here are our top 5 from New York’s novelty nosh list:

(The Original) Ramen Burger

$USD12
Smorgasburg
Saturdays 11am – 6pm at 90 Kent Ave. Williamsburg
Sundays 11am – 6pm in Prospect Park, Breeze Hill (East Drive at Lincoln Rd)

Most dishes born during the Frankenfood generation have more gimmick than game, but this isn’t one of them.

There isn’t much going on with the Ramen Burger (a bun of fried ramen noodles, an Angus beef patty, some rocket and a “secret” Shoyu sauce) but it just works. I mean sure, if you take a bite and close your eyes it tastes like you’re eating from a bowl of beef noodles, but is that such a bad thing?

As a messy eater with a penchant for white shirts, I appreciate this manageable alternative for my noodle fix.

Tip: the MVP here is the secret sauce so make sure to ask for extra.

Poké Burrito

From $USD9.95
Pokébab
209 Bedford Ave
Williamsburg

Let’s cut to the chase – this is the best tasting thing on the list.

Through some motion of wizadry, this Poké Burrito does not taste exactly like an oversized sushi roll. Each burrito is made to order through a chic Williamsburg version of the Subway / Kebab point-to-add method, and we’re attributing the success of this dish to the volume of different ingredients that the larger seaweed wrap accommodates.

The basic formula is seaweed layered with a base of white or brown rice, combined with a protein (I had spicy salmon sashimi and flying fish eggs) and crunchy salads (including scallions, radish sprouts, seaweed salad, pickled ginger and edamame for me), topped off with glorious sauces (soy and spicy Sriracha aioli, obviously). Ratio is everything here so I advise asking for the bare minimum when they’re laying the rice foundation.

Their only hiccup is the name; in a joint called Pokébab, is this not a Poke Kebab!? Unfortunately we were too busy making love to our meal to ask such hard questions of the establishment.

Raindrop Cake

$USD8
Smorgasburg
Saturdays 11am – 6pm at 90 Kent Ave. Williamsburg
Sundays 11am – 6pm in Prospect Park, Breeze Hill (East Drive at Lincoln Rd)

There’s quite a buzz (and queue) for this dessert, though we can only assume that’s because it has to be photographed before it can be tasted.

The “cake” is beautiful, and interesting to touch. But it also tastes like nothing, because it is literally almost nothing (simply spring water and agar agar, a vegan gelatine). Admittedly there is some flavour in the accompanying powder and sauce, but chewing through mushed up blobs of nothing floating in a nutty-flavoured sauce is still a bad date.

Folks, this dish is only featured here as a PSA to swipe left.

The Ultimate S’more

$USD8.75
Dominique Ansel Kitchen
137 7th Ave S
Greenwich Village

But novelty sweet seekers shall not fear, because the king of modern desserts is here! Dominique Ansel is the French-born pastry legend who introduced the world to cronuts, and now he’s on an exploration through all the s’mores possibilities.

I went for the Ultimate S’more, which is exactly what it says on the label. A clever balancing act of flavours allows the sea salt and bitter dark chocolate ganache to redress the sweetness of the honey marshmellow, while the crisp cookie, caramel puffed rice and milk chocolate shards offer some crunch to pierce through its gooeyness.

It’s delicious, but also huge and intense. Not to be attempted after a big meal or without a hot drink.

Broccoli Hot Dogs

$USD14 for a serving of two
Dirt Candy
86 Allen St
Lower East Side

Moving away from Frankenfood and towards some simply creative culinary is Amanda Cohen’s menu at Dirt Candy, a vegetarian institution in the Lower East Side.

Although true foodies understand that a vegetarian / vegan menu need not be a compromise on flavour or satisfaction, Cohen has made things extra tricky by limiting each tapas-style dish to predominantly one vegetable. We’re talking mono-veggie delights like Zucchini Takoyaki with zucchini flakes and zucchini curls ($USD13) and Carrot Sliders on an all-carrot sesame seed bun ($USD15), all of which are so more-ish that we were left practically licking our plates.

The best surprise on this menu is the Broccoli Hotdog – grilled and smoked broccoli dogs with broccoli kraut and mustard barbecue sauce ($USD14) – which tastes like all your broccoli dreams come true.

Apparently it took Cohen three months to perfect this originally off-menu item, and while fiddling with broccoli for three months doesn’t sound so fun, humanity is better off for her efforts.